How would I know my baby has diaper rash?

Diaper rash mostly appears in the diaper area. Your baby has diaper rash if he has mild redness and scaling on or around his buttocks, thighs and genitals. In a more severe case of rash pimples, blisters and sores can also form. If the rash gets infected the skin might become bright red and swollen. If it is still left untreated, the rash might start to spread even beyond the diaper area. If your baby’s skin looks like any of these, he has diaper rash.

Another symptom of diaper rash is that part of the diaper area affected by the rash gets slightly warmer. The baby also becomes very uncomfortable, especially during diaper changes. He also cries and makes a lot of fuss while the diaper area is being washed or touched.

What causes diaper rash?

There are several causes of diaper rash as the diaper area is the most suitable damp and dark area for rash to develop. The causes of the rash vary which is why sometimes its treatment fails. The major causes of diaper rash are as follows:

• Irritation: The most common cause of diaper rash is simple skin irritation. The baby’s skin is much more sensitive than an adult’s and is very prone to irritation. This irritation can be caused by the rubbing of the diaper against his skin if it is fit too tightly. It can also be caused if the baby is left in a wet pamper for too long. The prolonged exposure to ammonia and moisture can cause irritation and make the skin look red. A baby is more prone to diaper rash if he has frequent bowel movements as stool is more irritating than urine. You can know that your baby has a simple case of irritation if the diaper area is red but the folds of skin, a more protected part, are not red.

Other than this, irritation can also be caused by any new product that you introduce to your baby. Sometimes some new brand of wipes or diapers does not suit his skin. At other times it could also be a new soap, detergent or bleach that you use to wash his cloth diapers. Diaper rash can also be caused by some ingredients in baby powders, lotions and oils.

• Changes in Diet: Sometimes babies can also develop diaper rash when solids are introduced in their diet. Solids can change the constituents of the stool or lead to more frequent bowel movements, both eventually causing diaper rash. If a baby is breast-fed his diaper rash could also be a response to something in the mother’s diet.

• Use of Antibiotics: Sometimes when antibiotics are used to kill bacteria causing diaper rash a balance is not maintained. This imbalance can worsen the rash. If a child is breast-fed, the mother’s use of antibiotics can also cause him diaper rash.

• Bacterial or Yeast Infection: A mild diaper rash can grow and spread to areas outside the diaper too. The damp and moist area of the diaper is most suitable for the growth of germs, bacteria and yeast. Once the rash gets infected by yeast it becomes bright red and pimply. A bacterial or yeast infection can be differentiated from a mild irritation rash as it is present even in the folds of the baby’s skin where irritation rash is not.

• Plastic Pants: Rash can also be caused by plastic pants that tightly fit over diapers. These pants raise the heat and moisture level in the diaper area, making it a more suitable place for diaper rash to start and germs to grow.

How do I control and prevent diaper rash?

The most important factor in aiding the healing of diaper rash is to keep your baby’s diaper area clean, cool and dry. Practice the following healing and preventive measures to reduce the chance of your baby developing rash.

• Change Diapers Promptly: Keep checking your baby’s diaper frequently and change it as soon as it gets wet so that his skin is not exposed to the moisture and ammonia for a long time.

• Clean the Diaper Area: Whenever you change his diaper make sure to clean the diaper area well. Use plain, not hot water, with or without a mild perfume-free soap. Do not use wipes that contain alcohol or fragrance and make sure the baby’s diaper are is completely dry before putting on a new diaper. Do not scrub his bottom with a towel. Scrubbing can irritate the skin. Pat him dry or leave to air-dry.

• Air-time: Giving your baby some diaper-free time always helps with rash. The most appropriate time, when there is least chance of messy incidents, is right after his bowel movement.  You can also lay him on a big towel and engage in playing with him while he is bare-bottomed.

• Avoiding Plastic: Rash can also be caused by over tightening the diaper. Keep it a little loose so that the diaper area can breathe. You can also use a larger sized diaper for this purpose. Avoid using diapers with plastic edges or plastic pants that fit over diapers as they trap in the heat and moisture.

• Washing Cloth Diapers Thoroughly: If you are using cloth diapers, washing them thoroughly and keeping them clean is very important. Soak heavily soiled cloth diapers before washing them and use hot water to wash them. Use a mild detergent and skip fabric softeners as they may contain fragrances that could irritate your baby’s skin. Double rinse your baby’s diapers if he already has a diaper rash or is prone to developing diaper rash. You can also put half a cup of vinegar in the rinse cycle to get rid of alkaline irritants.

• Creams & Ointments: Use creams with zinc-oxide and petroleum at every diaper change to keep the moisture from reaching your baby’s skin. Some steroid creams can also be used but never apply them without consultation with a doctor.

• Wash Your Hands Thoroughly: After changing your baby’s diaper, wash your hands thoroughly every time to avoid the spreading of bacteria to other parts of the baby’s body or to your other children.

• Avoid Cornstarch or Talcum-powder: Both these products are not recommended for diaper rash. Talcum powder can get into the baby’s lungs and cornstarch makes a yeast infected rash worse.

When do I call the doctor?

Diaper rash is usually not a serious condition and it can be treated by following the simple home remedies suggested above. However, sometimes the diaper rash gets worse or persists for longer and you need to consult with a doctor. If your baby has the following symptoms, he needs professional medical attention. Do not delay taking him to see your pediatrician.

• The rash has appeared on the baby’s skin in the first six weeks.
• The rash seems to be infected.
• Pimples and small ulcers are formed.
• The baby is suffering from fever.
• The baby isn’t eating as he usually does or appears to be losing weight.
• The rash spreads to areas outside the diaper, such as arms, face or scalp.
• The rash persists for more than one week even though you have tried the home remedies listed above.

Cloth diapers or disposable diapers?

Parents often have this question, whether they should use cloth or disposable diapers. As far as diaper rash is concerned, there is no convincing evidence in favor of either. Some doctors suggest that cloth diapers are better as they do not hold too much moisture and allow more air to pass. Some suggest that disposable diapers are better as they are more absorbent and keep the baby’s skin drier. So it is a parent’s call which kind to use. If you use disposable diapers make sure to check if that brand suits your baby. Change and try another if a certain brand doesn’t seem to work out. If you use cloth diapers make sure to wash and clean them thoroughly as suggested earlier.

In both cases, the most important thing is that you check your baby’s diaper frequently and change it as soon as it gets wet and keep the baby’s bottom as clean and as dry as possible.

What is heat rash?

Heat rash appears on a baby’s skin as hundreds of tiny pink or red eruptions, each surrounding a pore. Sometimes they resemble tiny water blisters. The rash usually occurs on the baby’s cheeks, neck, shoulders, skin creases, diaper area and wherever clothes fit him snuggly. Although heat rash is more common is hot and humid climate, it can also occur in cold weather if the child is over heated due to heavy clothing.

How is heat rash caused?

Heat rash is caused by excessive sweating and a hindrance in the passage of that sweat out of the skin. The sweat glands normally release sweat through the duct onto the skin’s surface. When perspiration cannot reach the skin’s surface because of folds of skin or tight clothing, the sweat may break through the walls of the ducts and become trapped inside the internal layer of skin, causing inflammation. This is known as heat rash. Babies and younger children are more likely to get heat rash because their sweat glands are not fully developed yet.

How can heat rash be treated?

Most heat rashes clear up themselves in a few days. If it persists for longer, seems to be getting worse and is not responding to medicine, consult you baby’s doctor. Usually the baby can be relieved of the rash in the following methods:

• Avoid heat: Foremost, it is important to get rid of what causes the rash; heat. Move to a more airy place if you are indoors. In outdoor areas look for a cooler and shadier place and try to get the child some rest time if the rash is being caused by him running around in a hot and humid weather.
• Avoid heavy clothing: If a baby starts to get very hot and develops heat rash remove his clothing if possible. If not then dress him in lighter clothes. Always opt for cotton and natural fibers instead of nylon or polyester which trap heat. When a baby has developed heat rash try to give him as much nappy-free time as possible.
• Keeping the skin cool: To directly cool the affected area of the baby’s skin give the baby a cool bath. After a bath, let the skin air-dry and do not use towels, they can cause friction and irritation with the rash. Like a little nappy-free time, allowing the child some nude time also quickens the healing process.
• Applying cream: Use calamine lotion directly on the baby’s skin taking special care to avoid the eyes. You can also use a hydrocortisone cream if your doctor advises so for a severe rash. Avoid using any other cream or lotion on the baby’s skin as it traps moisture and makes the rash worse.

Some important things to remember about heat rash are that when adopting the above ways to cool down your baby’s body temperature, keep an eye out for it. The baby might get chilly and need to be warmed up again. To avoid heat rash, make sure your child is wearing light clothes whenever you venture outdoors in a hot and humid climate. Clean the sweat prone areas with wet wipes to avoid clogging of the pores by excessive sweat. Heat rash can also be caused by fever. If your baby has fever, in addition to following these above steps investigate into and treat the baby’s fever which is the real cause of the rash. Remember, heat rash is caused by fever but fever is not caused by heat rash.

• Safety Belt: Always purchase a stroller that has a safety belt with a crotch strap and get into the habit of using it whenever you put your baby in the stroller. Infants might not seem very active but using a safety belt is always a good measure because it saves the baby from many accidents. A seatbelt should fit securely around the sides and front of your baby’s waist. For this purpose a buckle design in the form of a T is most suitable. The T is attached to the crotch strap with the right and left waist belt parts buckling into that T separately. The most effective seat belt to restrain a child from climbing out, standing up or slipping out of a stroller is a five point strap that does not only include a crotch strap and waist belt but two straps that fit into the buckle after passing over the baby’s shoulders.Some strollers have belts that fasten across the stroller rather than around the baby, leaving a gap on the sides that might enable a toddler to get out. Always choose a stroller with buckles and restraint systems that secure a child tightly.
• Stroller Balance: Always choose a stroller that has a wide, long wheelbase and a seat that is mounted deep into the frame. This gives it more stability and the stroller resists tipping backwards when pressed lightly on the handles. For ensuring safety, never hang baggage with the stroller handles, it makes it more likely to tip backwards. Do not use a stroller for two children unless it has two seats and is meant to be used so. Putting any baggage over the canopy is also dangerous as it can collapse and cause injury to your child.
• Brakes: When purchasing a stroller make sure you buy one that has the rear wheel locking mechanism that works by engaging sprocket arrangement at the wheels rather than solely relying upon the breaks pressing on the tire. Pressing breaks are generally unreliable because they can permit unwanted rolling of strollers backwards or forwards even when the break is in contact with the tire. But, whichever breaking mechanism the stroller may have, do not rely on it to hold a stroller stationary on an inclined surface.
• Frame Safety: The frame of the stroller should not have any hazardous sharp edges. The small fingers and toes of your child can get stuck and hurt between metal parts and coils of uncovered springs. X-joints, where two tubes of the frame come together, can be particularly dangerous as they can act like scissors and can trap a child’s fingers or toes. Make sure the plastic caps at the ends of the handle are also tight and secured to that the baby does not remove them or choke on them.
• Secondary Safety Latch: When you set up the stroller there is a locking mechanism that keeps your stroller open and prevents it from collapsing. Many strollers have one locking mechanism. Some offer two locks or an automatic safety catch which means that it would take two locks to be released to fold the stroller. So even if the main lock fails, there is a secondary lock to prevent the stroller from folding and causing serious injury to your child.
  Some strollers, especially older models, have unsatisfactory metal slip rings that slide down over the overlapping edges of the frame’s tubing to hold the handle erect. These can easily become mispositioned or slide out of place causing the unit to collapse. These designs of strollers are not recommended from a safety point of view.
• Your Child Near a Stroller:  When your child is near his stroller exercise caution in handling it. Do not open or fold the stroller near him, the scissoring action can trap small fingers and cause injuries. Do not let children play with strollers either. It is dangerous to let children give each other rides in strollers and treat them as toys. Be careful when adjusting the reclining backrest and exposing the bracket which is shaped like a rooster comb when your child is in or around the stroller.
• Your Child Inside a Stroller: Do not try to carry a stroller with your baby in it. There is a big chance of tripping, hurting yourself and your baby. Avoid trying to carry the stroller with the child up or down the stairs. The stroller could easily fall with the child and cause serious injury. When shopping in malls, instead of using the escalator with strollers (in fact strollers are prohibited on escalators in many places) use elevators. Do not reverse the stroller handle while your child is in it. There is a chance that when you move the handle from front to back or back to front your child’s fingers, hands or arms may get caught between them. Always check that the locking mechanism of the handle is securely engaged.
• Using the stroller according to the baby’s age: If your baby is younger than seven months do not let him sleep in a stroller unattended as infants can slip through the leg opening, causing entrapment or possible strangulation. Stop using the stroller when your child weighs more than 36 pounds. A child usually weighs that much around 3 years of age. He then becomes too active or too tall for safely using a stroller.
• For Multiple Occupancy strollers follow the correct entry and exit sequence: For a multiple occupancy stroller (a side-by-side design or tandem style) follow the manufacturer’s instructions for loading and unloading children. If these instructions are not followed there is a chance of misbalance in weight and the stroller becomes more prone to toppling over and causing injury to your child. 
• Never leave your baby unattended in a stroller.

Buying Tips:

Choosing one stroller out of the several types that you will find in a store can be a hard job. Follow these tips to make the right choice more easily.

• Safety Features: Safety, as with all other baby accessories, is the foremost concern of a parent. First of all, before buying a stroller, ensure that it has adequate safety features for your baby. (For details of these features go to this article.)
• Walk the Stroller: Before buying the stroller you like walk in the store to get a feel of it. Walking a stroller will help you decide whether you are comfortable with or not. For instance the handle height might not be adequate for you. A comfortable handle height is usually at the waist level or a little below. For taller parents or those who have a significant difference in height, strollers with adjustable handle heights are very convenient so that both the parents can walk them easily. Handles covered with foam also add to the comfort of the parent or caregiver.
• Steering Ease: Before making a purchase check that the stroller runs easily and can be pushed in a straight line without veering by using one hand only. A good stroller also does corners smoothly, this is important when strolling a baby in crowds. Usually the bigger the diameter of the wheels the easier it is to negotiate curbs and sidewalk irregularities. Make sure all four tires are aligned. In case of double wheels, all eight wheels should make contact with the floor and rotate when the stroller is in motion. Also try walking the stroller at a fast pace to see if your feet bump against the wheels.
• Weight: When buying a stroller it is importance to keep its weight and folding ability in mind. There are several models of lightweight strollers these days that weigh less than 20 pounds and have the same features as heavyweight strollers. These strollers are also foldable and can easily be stored in a car’s truck for traveling. If you have a smaller car, keep in mind the size of the trunk and make sure the stroller you purchase will fit in the trunk when folded. It is always hard for parents to choose between a plastic or metal stroller. Metal strollers have sturdier frames and last longer. However plastic strollers are lighter in weight. It is a tradeoff between weight and sturdiness and the parent has to decide for him/herself which to buy. Perhaps if the stroller will be used for several children then a metal one would be a good choice. A plastic stroller can be more convenient for parents who travel frequently.
• Convenience Features: For s stroller to be convenient and easy to use there are a number of features that you should look for. Always look for a stroller with an adjustable seat. As your baby grows the inclination of the seat that is comfortable for him changes. So the angle that was comfortable for your six month old baby will not be comfortable for a one year old. A stroller should always have an extra storage area for the baby’s accessories or even parents’ use if he/she goes shopping. Before buying s stroller check that it has a good balance and does not topple over if you hang a baby bag with the handles. A stroller must always be made of a washable fabric as no baby is above making mess. Sooner or later the stroller will get dirty enough to want washing. The stroller must also include a canopy to protect the baby from sunshine or rain.
• Multiple seats: Sometimes when a couple has twins or two children close in age, they need to buy a stroller that can accommodate both. There are strollers available with up to four seats but those are rare. The most common ones with multiple seats are those that have two seats. These seats can be side by side or tandem style. The side-by-side style is appropriate for twins but not for children of different ages as they weigh differently and the heavier side has a chance of toppling over. The tandem style outsells the adjacent seat style because even with children of different weights it has no chance of toppling. Furthermore, the tandem style, when folded, occupies almost the same amount of space as a normal one seat stroller. However, a stroller with adjacent seats occupies double the space.
• Price: Lastly, price is always an important factor in deciding which stroller you want to buy. Remember, expensive strollers are sturdier and have better materials in manufacturing. They last longer. So if the stroller is intended to be used for several children, an expensive one would be a good long-term investment.

Stroller Maintenance

A stroller suffers outdoor wear more than any other baby equipment. Following are tips to keep a stroller clean and prolong its life and usability.

• Park the stroller inside after use and protect it, as much as possible, from dust, dirt and dampness.
• Check the stroller for loose screws, worn out parts or torn stitching from time to time and mend it immediately.
• Clean metal and plastic surfaces regularly with a damp cloth.
• Oil the moving parts of the stroller, for example axles, hinges, joints etc. occasionally with light household oil.
• To clean vinyl upholstery use mild soap and water, rinse thoroughly afterwards and allow it to dry naturally.
• Strong detergents, bleaches, solvents and abrasive cleaners may damage vinyl and fabric.
• Avoid soaking the stroller completely with water as it may soften pressboards and seat pans etc.
• Follow any special cleaning instructions if given by the manufacturers.

Cradle Cap is harmless; this is the first thing you should know about it. It is aesthetically displeasing but usually harmless for the baby until it aggravates to a degree that it looks red and swollen, then it may cause itching.

Cradle Cap is a condition of the skin. The human skin is always producing new cells and shedding off old ones, a process that we do not notice. Babies suffering from Cradle Cap have hyperactive seborrheic glands that are responsible for producing oil. Their skin produces new cells at a faster rate than it sheds them, which results in flaky or dry skin that looks like dandruff, or thick, oily, yellow/brown scaling or patches on the head.

Sometimes this skin condition can also occur on other parts of the baby’s body, for example around the ears and eyebrows and creases like armpits or even the diaper area. Then this condition is known as seborrheic dermatitis as it occurs where there is the greatest number of oil-producing sebaceous glands.

Why does Cradle Cap occur?

Cradle Cap can occur in any baby, there are no risk factors that make one baby more prone to it than the other. It usually occurs in the first six weeks of the baby’s life and usually continues up till three months of age. Most often Cradle Cap resolves itself and no treatment is required. However, in some cases the condition may prolong to several months or beyond.

The exact reason for the occurrence of Cradle Cap is not agreed upon. The most common consensus is on the opinion that it is caused by hormones passed from the mother to the baby, through the placenta, just before birth. These hormones are thought to over stimulate the seborrheic glands, producing more oils and making scaly patches appear over the skin.

Cradle Cap is not infectious or contagious. Some suggest that it is an allergic reaction or is caused by poor hygiene; however, both these views are wrong. Cradle Cap can occur in any baby and mostly goes away itself.

How do I treat my baby’s Cradle Cap?

No treatment is really required for Cradle Cap, it goes away by itself. However, it is unpleasing for parents to see their baby’s skin like that. If it bothers them, they could try to shampooing regularly with a mild shampoo and brushing the baby’s scalp with a soft brush or terry cloth. Don’t be afraid to shampoo the baby’s hair, in fact it should be done more frequently, about 2-3 times a week.

For more persistent cases of Cradle Cap, sometime the oil treatment is helpful. However, it is important to know that oil helps to build scales by clogging the pores and allowing the scales to stick, if used in a large amount or allowed to stay on the scalp. If oil is being used, use a small amount. Rub it into the baby’s scalp; leave it on for a few minutes (it will help to loosen the scales) and then comb out the scales gently with a soft brush or tooth-comb. Be sure to shampoo the baby’s head afterwards so that the oil does not stay in.

For even more persistent cases that are not resolved by oil or shampoo, doctors may suggest stronger medicated shampoos. But do not use an antiseborrhea without consulting your pediatrician first as these shampoos contain small amounts of sulfur and salicylic acid and may cause irritation to the baby. The doctor may prescribe some other lotions or creams to treat the redness and scales.

Can I prevent Cradle Cap from coming back again?

If the Cradle Cap has completely disappeared, it is unlikely to come back again. If your child is a year old it rarely comes back before puberty. However, preventive measures include washing the baby’s hair frequently, about two to three times a week. Take care not to over do it as it may stimulate the oil glands and produce more oil.

If the condition keeps persisting off and on and does not finish completely you might need to keep using antiseborrhea shampoos in frequent intervals. However, consult your pediatrician before any such step and let him/her decide if your baby still needs those shampoos or lotions.

Why does postnatal depression occur?

The exact reason for postnatal depression is not agreed upon by all researchers and doctors. It seems to be more of a combination of reasons rather than just one. The foremost reason of postnatal depression is the drop in the level of hormones (estrogen and progesterone) after birth as these pregnancy hormones dissipate and milk production starts. Some authorities believe that it can also be caused by an unusually taxing birth with a prolonged and difficult labour. Some others are of the opinion that it could also be because of a sense of physical and emotional anticlimax after the birth. Many mothers say it is simply caused by total exhaustion from too little sleep and too much responsibility.

Mothers can initially feel overwhelmed by the responsibility of motherhood, and the prospect of ‘a mother is born when a child is born’ can seem scary. When the child is brought home from the hospital, a mother needs to set up a new life that she is formerly not accustomed to. This can take time and prove to be taxing for her. In addition, a new mother might also try to emulate the Supermom standards of parenting that she has read and heard about—the standards that say any intelligent, healthy woman can handle everything. It is important to prepare yourself for imperfections before the baby is born. Everything cannot be and will not be perfect. Trying to follow everything read and heard is impossible and only leads to depression by making a mother feel inadequate for caring for her child.

A mother must realize that feeling low after giving birth does not mean she does not love her baby. Neither is it unnatural or something to feel ashamed and alarmed about. Around 80% of all mothers suffer from some kind of post natal depression. The duration and intensity of each might vary. That is why it is important to know about the types of postnatal depression to be able to identify if you or someone you know has crossed over from the regular baby blues to a more serious state.

Postnatal depression is generally categorized as:

• Baby Blues
• Postpartum Depression
• Postpartum Psychosis

Baby Blues:

Some degree of emotional vulnerability and is natural and expected after child birth. Almost 80% of all women who give birth experience the blues that start shortly (3-4 days) after the delivery and can linger up to two weeks. Feeling low after child birth is not a disease and does not require any treatment, only understanding and support from friends and family. As a new mother acquires confidence in her role as a parent and regains her strength and sleep with rest and help, she finds that her approach falls into a sensible perspective and she feels herself again. In this way baby blues often treat themselves.

Symptoms of the blues consist of:

• Crying for no reason
• Moodiness
• Feeling exhausted
• Restlessness and sleeplessness
• Anxiety, worry and nervousness
• Change in appetite  (eating more or less)
• General irritability

These feelings do not hamper the mother’s ability to function in daily life. They last for a few days and then go away by themselves. However, it is important to know that if they persist and increase in intensity, the blues could well be Postpartum Depression. It is important to know the difference between the two and not to confuse them with each other as they share symptoms.

Postpartum Depression:

If the baby blues last for longer than two weeks and the symptoms become so troublesome that they hamper a mother’s ability to take care of her child, she might be suffering from postpartum depression. It is important, in this case, to contact a doctor and seek professional help. Postpartum depression is experienced by 10-20% of all women after childbirth. It can start within a few weeks after birth to any time in the following year.

Symptoms of Postpartum Depression include:

• Insomnia
• Uncontrollable crying or feeling of hopelessness
• Lack of interest in pleasurable activities & withdrawal from society
• Reduced concentration & having trouble completing routine tasks
• Changes in appetite
• Sluggishness, fatigue, exhaustion and anxiety
• Mood swings – highs and lows
• Lack of interest in the baby and not feeling bonded
• Negative thoughts of harming oneself or the baby
• Panic attacks (a racing heart, dizziness, confusion, and feelings of impending doom)

Postpartum depression occurs due to the same psychological, sociological and physiological changes as baby blues, and can happen to any woman. However, a few factors make it more likely for the blues to turn into depression. A woman is more vulnerable if she:

• Has had an unhappy childhood (perhaps mental or physical abuse)
• Has a history of depression or difficulty coping with stress
• Has had an unwanted or unplanned baby
• Has had a premature birth or an ill baby
• Has an unsupportive spouse or marital difficulties
• Has had a major life changing event (e.g. a move, or loss of a job)
• A personal or family history of thyroid problems. (Thyroid dysfunction doesn’t mean you’ll have PPD, but it can predispose you to postpartum thyroid problems, which may have symptoms similar to those of PPD. It’s good to have your thyroid tested if you’re feeling low, especially if you have a family history of thyroid problems.) (click for source)

It is important to keep in mind that these are only risk factors, having one of them sometimes leads women to postpartum depression and at other times, having even several does not result in depression at all.

How to cope with Postpartum Depression:

Postpartum depression should not be taken lightly. If a mother feels she has symptoms of depression, she should consult her doctor and seek help and support from those close to her. In addition to receiving medical treatment, following are things that she can do for herself:

• Make time for yourself: Make sure you take good care of yourself, your health and sleep. Schedule a babysitter for a regular time so that you can get time to take a relaxing shower or read a good book or go to watch a movie. Do not feel that you are abandoning your child. Little breaks like these will help you take better care of him.
• Do not feel guilty: Do not allow yourself to feel guilty. Having postpartum depression is not your fault and it does not mean you do not love your child.
• Indulge in pleasurable activities: Start enjoying activities that you used to like before the baby came. Read something uplifting, visit a friend, page through a magazine, listen to music, sip a cup of tea etc. Do not shun society and try to be with family and friends who can provide support and comfort.
• Ask for and accept help: Don’t hesitate from asking for emotional support or help with caring for the baby or tackling household chores. A part of being a mother is to know when to ask for help and accept it. Do not feel embarrassed or ashamed about it. Share your feelings with people who matter to you, let them know what you are going through and seek their support. You can also join a support group or a forum. It helps to know that you are not the only one with Postpartum Depression.
• Sleep when the baby sleeps: It is important to catch on sleep so that exhaustion from caring for the baby does not contribute to depression. It is a good idea to sleep when the baby sleeps. Do not rush to do other chores in that time, those can be done later. Choose a quiet place with minimal disturbance and get as much rest as you can. If necessary, have a relative look after your child or hire a baby sitter and get sleep.
• Do not neglect your outlook: Taking care of your physical appearance can sometimes help you feel better. Have someone look after your baby while you take a relaxing shower, put on make-up or go for shopping. Getting out of doors, even if it’s only for a short walk is beneficial. The fresh air and sunshine can do wonders for a fatigued mind and body.

Postpartum Psychosis:

The third and rarest but most serious kind of postnatal depression is Postpartum Psychosis. One woman out of every 1000 women giving childbirth experiences this period when she seems to lose touch with reality. This depression can set in at any time from a few weeks after deliver up to a year. Its reasons of occurrence are no different than those for usual postnatal depression but sadly it is often misdiagnosed as Postpartum Depression, which makes it harder to provide it the medical attention it deserves. Postpartum Psychosis should always be taken seriously and treated pronto as it can be very harmful for the mother and the baby. Suicidal rate in Psychotic mothers is 5% and infanticide rate 4%.

Symptoms of Postpartum Psychosis are as follows:

• Hallucinations
• Delusions
• Illogical thoughts about the baby e.g. thinking he is possessed
• Insomnia
• Refusal to eat
• Extreme feelings of anxiety and agitation
• Periods of delirium or mania
• Suicidal/homicidal thoughts or attempts

Women more prone to Postpartum Psychosis are those who have a personal or familial history of psychiatric illnesses, such as bipolar disorder or schizoaffective disorder. Immediate attention should be given to a Postpartum Psychosis patient by medicine and talk therapy.

Postnatal depression is a very natural effect of the long and exhaustive process of pregnancy, labour and childbirth. It is nothing to be embarrassed about and you should not feel shy in seeking professional help, talking to people about it, expressing your feelings and asking for help with the new baby and the new life that you have entered. If a loved one is going through postnatal depression try to understand her situation, extend a helping hand and a comforting shoulder. Help her around with the baby, cook her a meal, take her on a walk, listen to her. These small things would remind a mother going through the blues, of her own value and how much she is loved. If your wife is going through postnatal depression try to understand her and not judge her. Postnatal depression can be hard for husbands too but be patient and kind. Remember things will not be like this always, brighter days lie ahead, but your support is vital for your wife’s recovery.

Sources Cited & Further Reading:

• Baby Centre
• Women’s Health
• Mayo Clinic
• Kids Health (for parents)
• Pregnancy Info

SIDS can occur in children from all races, socio-economic and ethnic backgrounds from urban and rural areas. Its likelihood is not determined by any factor accept adherence to the precautionary measures suggested by doctors and researchers. There are no symptoms of SIDS. It occurs in healthy babies who feed normally. SIDS mostly occurs during sleep which is why it is also known as Cot or Crib death and the baby shows no signs of suffering. SIDS has only recently been established as a separate disease entity and can be given as an official cause of death. If the child’s death remains unexplained even after a formal investigation into the circumstances of death (including performance of a complete autopsy, examination of the death scene, and review of the clinical history), the death is then attributed to SIDS.

Possible Causes of SIDS:

• Sleeping on Stomach: The most widely accepted cause of SIDS is putting the baby to sleep on his stomach. Numerous studies and researches conclude that most SIDS deaths have occurred in babies who sleep on their stomachs. It was formerly thought that babies should be put to sleep on their stomach as they rest better and sleep more soundly in that position. However, after research results have shown that stomach sleeping increases the risk of SIDS, parents are advised against it.According to researchers’ hypothesis stomach sleeping puts pressure on the baby’s jaws that hampers breathing by narrowing the airway.

  Another theory suggests that stomach sleeping can increase an infant’s chances of re-breathing his own exhaled air, particularly if he is sleeping on a soft mattress or with bedding, stuffed toys, or a pillow near his face. These soft surfaces can create a small enclosure around the baby’s mouth and trap exhaled air. As the baby breathes exhaled air, the oxygen level in the body drops and carbon dioxide accumulates. This lack of oxygen can contribute to SIDS. (Click for source)

• Abnormality in the Arcuate Nucleus: Infants who have some kind of a breathing disorder might be more likely to succumb to SIDS. For example, they may have an abnormality in the arcuate nucleus, a part of the brain that may help control breathing and awakening during sleep. If a baby is breathing stale air and not getting enough oxygen, the brain usually alarms the baby to wake up and cry. That movement changes the breathing and heart rate, making up for the lack of oxygen. But a problem with the arcuate nucleus could deprive the baby of this involuntary reaction and put him at greater risk for SIDS.
  (ibid.)
• Apnea (lack/cessation of breathing): Many young infants have an uneven breathing pattern. Some even have periods, known as apneic episodes, when they do not take a breath for up to 20 seconds or longer. One theory of SIDS suggests that for some babies, the respiratory system is so underdeveloped that they do not take a breath after an apneic episode. Infants with apnea may be monitored with electronic monitors prescribed by doctors that track heart rate and respiratory activity, though these monitors cannot prevent SIDS. Prolonged apnea may put a baby on a greater risk of SIDS but most apneic babies do not die of SIDS and most SIDS babies do not have apnea.
• Choking: Sometimes regurgitated food is found in the mouth or nasal passage of a baby who has died of SIDS. In these cases physicians or investigators believe that choking on these substances was the cause of SIDS. However, vomiting frequently occurs at the time of death. So these findings might not be the cause of death but its result.
• Allergy: An allergy, especially to cow’s milk, was also once thought to be a cause of SIDS. As SIDS mostly occurs in babies from 2-6 months (a time when they are gradually being weaned from the breast to the bottle) cow’s milk was thought to be the culprit. However, research shows that babies who have been breast-fed exclusively also die of SIDS. Breast feeding however may help to prevent infections that could possibly lead to SIDS.
• Smoking: Studies show that a baby’s risk of SIDS rises if he is exposed to second hand smoke. Each additional smoker in the household, the number of cigarettes smoked around him each day, and the length of his exposure to cigarette smoke, all contribute to a possible SIDS death.
• Premature Birth or Low Birth Weight: Babies who are born prematurely or those who have a lower birth rate are also at a higher risk of SIDS.
• Overheating while Sleeping: Research shows strong evidence that overheating by too much clothing, putting a blanket over the baby’s head or overheating the room can substantially raise the risk of a SIDS death.
• Suffering an Apparent Life Threatening Event (ALTE): It is also thought that babies who suffer apparently life threatening events such as abrupt changes in breathing, color and muscle tone and requiring resuscitation are at a greater risk of SIDS. However, no definite scientific evidence links ALTEs as events that may lead to SIDS.
• For Mothers: SIDS is not hereditary, however babies are at a higher risk of SIDS death if the mother:
  • Has had inadequate parental care
  • Is younger than 20 years
  • Has had low weight gain during pregnancy
  • Has smoked or used drugs during pregnancy
  • Has had placental abnormalities — such as ‘placenta previa,’ a condition where the placenta lies low in the uterus, sometimes covering the opening of the cervix. (click for source)

Measures That Can be Taken to Reduce the Risk of SIDS:

Although SIDS can occur without any known reason and besides taking preventive measures, based on research and the possible causes of SIDS, following are measures that can reduce the risk of its occurrence.

• Back Sleeping: Researchers have claimed that putting the baby to sleep on his stomach is the most likely cause of SIDS. Since then the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has included putting a baby to sleep on his back in its guidelines. Some parents worry that sleeping on the back might cause their baby to choke on spit-up or vomit. However, according to AAP, healthy babies are at no more risk of chocking on their backs than they are on their stomachs. If your baby has chronic gastroesophageal reflux disease [GERD] or certain upper airway malformations, consult your doctor about the best position for your baby to sleep. It might be a better idea to put such babies to sleep on their stomachs.If you are worried about the baby spending too much time on his back and developing a problem because of that, allow the baby more ‘tummy time’ when he is awake. When babies learn to roll over it might become difficult to keep them on their back all night. At this stage the baby is already 4-7 months and it is quite alright to let him decide a sleeping position for himself.
• Good Prenatal Care: Take good care of yourself and your baby during pregnancy. Have regular checkups to ensure normal weight gain and baby growth. After delivery, have your baby checked up regularly, especially if he is premature or had a low birth weight.
• Avoid Smoking: Avoid smoking, drinking and using drugs during pregnancy. Babies born to mothers who have smoked during pregnancy are thrice more likely to die of SIDS than those whose mothers have not smoked. It is thought that smoke affects a baby’s nervous system. Avoid a baby’s exposure to second hand smoke as it doubles the risk of SIDS. Do not allow people to smoke around your child.
• Prevent Suffocation and Overheating: Make sure the baby is not over heated when sleeping. Make sure to keep the baby’s head exposed while sleeping. Keep a room temperature that feels comfortable for an adult in short sleeves. Being too warm while sleeping makes babies go into a deeper sleep which is hard to arouse from.
  Always put your baby to sleep on a firm mattress, never on a pillow, waterbed, sheep skin or other soft surfaces. Do not place quilts, blankets, stuff toys and pillows near the baby as these may lead to suffocation and re-breathing of stale air.
• In case of GERD: If your baby has GERD, consult your doctor about his sleeping and feeding positions.
• Using a Pacifier: In the first few months of his life, put your baby to sleep with a pacifier. Research has linked pacifiers with lower risk of SIDS. Start giving him a pacifier after the first month so that he establishes breast feeding and the pacifier does not hinder with it. However, if your baby rejects a dummy, do not force him to take it.
• Safety Measures for Co-Sleep: Whether to sleep with the baby in the same bed or put him in a crib or bassinet, is still debated. In biblical times SIDS was known as ‘overlaying’ (because it was thought the mother had lain atop the baby while sleeping.) This surely is a risk if you sleep with your baby (sometimes called co-sleeping) so it is a good idea to put a baby in his crib when he is about to sleep. The cribs or bassinets should be in the parent’s room so that they can keep checking on the baby regularly. The parents’ bed also contains soft beddings, cushions and pillows, all that can lead to suffocation. There is a higher risk of overheating with the quilts and blankets and the presence of the mother.But, on the other hand, some people are of the opinion that babies should sleep with mothers in their beds. This allows the mother to respond quickly to any movement or change in their breathing patterns.

  The choice is to be made by the mother. If she decides to take her baby to bed there are a number of things she should keep in mind. The mattress should be firm and flat, tightly fit against the headboard leaving no gaps. There should be no fluffy pillows or heavy bedding that can cause breathing problems for the child. And the baby should be put to sleep on his back.

Why are the Causes of SIDS Unknown?

The efforts to determine the causes of SIDS are greatly hampered by underreporting and misreporting of SIDS deaths. As SIDS has no symptoms its cause can only be investigated into after the death has occured. This requires an autopsy, which, in many places of the world, requires parental permission. Many parents do not agree to it and the death may be registered due to some other cause. Even if the autopsy is carried out different children, from different areas of the world, have different reports. This lack on inconsistency makes it very hard to determine the cause of SIDS. The parents of SIDS babies, often victims of guilt and self-blame, also think of reasons for their child’s death to console themselves. Absolute absence of answers can be unacceptable. Thus SIDS can be registered as a death caused by the reason imagined by the parents.

Dealing with SIDS:

Parents of a SIDS baby suffer a great loss. Unlike parents of a baby who suffers from a disease, parents of a SIDS baby are taken aback by the suddenness of the death and do not have any warning or time to emotionally prepare themselves. Not only the parents, other caregivers such as grandparents, a baby sitter and the baby’s siblings (especially if they are old enough to help with taking care of him and have developed a special bond) suffer too. Their loss is often overlooked while focusing on the parents only.

In face of such a loss the bereaved parents usually experience feelings of guilt, anger, fear, blame and despair. As the causes of SIDS are unknown, parents often come up with their own explanations for the tragedy and blame themselves. This is a very common reaction; however, it is important to keep in mind that SIDS is not the parents’ fault. Besides taking the preventive measures there is nothing they can do to prevent it.

SIDS can affect a marital relationship and family life in general. It is good to talk to others about your feelings instead of bottling them up. There are support groups available for parents and families who have suffered from a SIDS death. You can also consider counseling or talking to other parents who have been through the same experience. However, the best support always comes from one’s own friends and family.

Sucking, as mentioned earlier in Benefits of Breast Feeding and Thumb Sucking, is a baby’s earliest reflex. Some ultrasounds show babies sucking on their thumbs inside the mother’s womb. It is easy to reason out a baby’s need to suck even before birth. By sucking on his thumb he develops the ability that is so vital to fulfill his nutritional needs later. Dummies pacify babies by fulfilling this need to suck, but that also requires a wise decision on the parent’s part. Otherwise it might lead to over dependency on the dummy and yield disadvantages discussed later in this article.

What is a dummy?A dummy is a ‘blind’ teat (without a hole in it) attached to a disc that rests against the baby’s lips to keep the teat from being pulled entirely into his mouth. On the back of the disc is a ring by which the pacifier can be held by the baby, or attached to his clothes by a ribbon. Never hang the dummy around a baby’s neck in a ribbon; there is a risk of the baby being strangled by the ribbon if it winds around his neck. (Baby and Child Care by Dr. Benjamin Spock)

When and why do parents use a dummy?

It is noted that dummies are mostly used when the baby is 2-3 months old. Surveys have also shown that parents usually use dummies when it is their first child and more likely, if it’s a boy. Dummies pacify crying babies because sucking on something calms them down. The reason for a baby’s cry could be anything from being colic to wanting to suck at something the whole time. Some babies have a very strong urge to suck so they want to be at the breast or bottle the whole time. This demand can be very hard to fulfill and the baby’s constant crying can be very disturbing and distractive. For such babies, dummies can be very helpful (although a mother must take care of a dummy affecting her milk supply which is discussed later.) A baby often reacts quickly and absolutely to dummies. He either accepts it and enjoys it very much or rejects it completely.

Advantages of a dummy:

• Sleep: A dummy can help in putting a baby to sleep. A pacifier also helps to keep the baby asleep even if he is disturbed at night. He will start to suck on the dummy and has more chances of going back to sleep without opening his eyes.
• Calming: As sucking helps babies to calm themselves and gives them a feeling of security, a dummy can help a baby if he is suddenly frightened by something around him. Parents also widely use dummies through their baby’s colic episodes.
• Dental problems: If a baby is given a dummy he is less likely to develop the habit of thumb sucking. Dummies and thumb sucking, both can lead to dental problems and people argue that both are as aesthetically displeasing. Then why substitute the thumb with a dummy? Their argument is valid but children are often weaned off dummies (or they should be) by the age of 3-4 months. Colic ends by that time too so a dummy is less needed. On the other hand, thumb sucking is likely to persist for a longer period and has more chances of creating dental problems when the baby begins to teeth. A dummy can be thrown away at one point but the thumb cannot. Recent research also shows that children who suck their fingers rather than dummies have higher chances of tooth decay because sucking a dummy produces more saliva which helps combat plaque.
• Lesser risk of smoking as adults: Research shows that adults who have had dummies as babies are less likely to take up smoking. (Click for source)
• Lesser risk of Cot Death: In June 2007 The Foundation for Study of Infant Deaths announced that putting the baby to sleep with a dummy can reduce the risk of cot death or Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS.) No one reason has been pointed out for SIDS; however, many precautionary measures have been suggested. The use of a dummy while a baby is sleeping is one of them. The dummies’ bulky external handles might prevent babies suffering accidental lack of oxygen from having their faces buried in blankets or underneath adults’ bodies. Sucking dummies also improves development of babies’ airways. It is also thought that sleeping with a dummy positively affects a baby’s sleeping posture and helps prevent SIDS. Another theory also explains that a dummy might keep a baby in a greater state of arousal while sleeping, making him less vulnerable to SIDS. (Click for source:)

Disadvantages of using a dummy:

• Possible link to ear infections: There is thought to be a possible link between prolonged dummy use and middle ear infections. It’s thought that sucking on a dummy increases the chance of an infection back-tracking from the mouth into the Eustachian tube (the air-filled passage connecting the middle ear with the back of the throat.) A study conducted in Netherlands showed that children who used a dummy were slightly more prone to ear infection for the first time. However, the tendency for them to get ear infection repeatedly, when using a dummy, after the first time, increases. The researchers think this might be because the first infection irritates the lining of a child’s ear. This could make them more vulnerable to ear infections in future. So, sucking a dummy might cause ear infections in children who already have irritation in their ear, but not in children who don’t. Although this is only a theory. (Click for source)
• Long-term dummy use and dental problems: Using dummies for a long term can also cause dental problems especially if the child is still using it as a comforter when his milk or permanent teeth appear. That is why it is important to wean a baby off the dummy in the first few months of his life.
• Speech Problems: A dummy prevents babies from babbling, which is the foundation of speech and an important step in learning to talk. It also discourages toddlers from chatting and communicating with others readily, which they need to do to develop their language skills. A dummy may prevent a baby from using all his tongue movements. An older baby’s ability to swallow may also be impaired, and this can result in difficulties with speech. Once he starts to speak, he may talk from the back of his mouth instead of the front. Nadine Arditti, a speech therapist from Manchester, researched children attending her clinic and found that just over half of all dummy-users in her area had been referred for speech therapy. (Click for source)
• Problems with breast feeding: The supply of milk is reduced because of excessive use of a dummy in the initial weeks of a baby’s life. The baby’s sucking on the breasts produces exactly the amount of milk he needs. By reducing that and substituting it with sucking on a dummy, there is a chance of reducing the supply of milk in the mother. Mothers also use dummies to stretch out the period between breastfeeds, thus reducing their supply of breast milk. It is therefore advised not to give the baby a dummy in the first 1-2 months so that he establishes a regular cycle of feeding. Then, occasionally giving him the dummy won’t affect the mother’s supply of milk. It is also thought that dummies alter an infant’s sucking technique. Dummies may cause sucking confusion for a small baby and this can result in early weaning. (Click for source)
• Mouth breathing: Sometimes, babies who use dummies develop the habit of breathing through their mouths which, in turn, results in long-term dribbling. (Click for source)

Important things to keep in mind for using a dummy:

• Before popping a dummy into a baby’s mouth make sure he is not crying because of something else.
• Don’t get in a habit of using a dummy regularly. Keep it as a last resort when the baby is crying or offer it only at bedtime or spells of colic.
• Don’t automatically give a dummy to your baby; wait for him to ask for it.
• Wean your baby off the dummy as soon as possible, especially before he is 10-12 months old. It gets much harder to wean a baby after this age.
• Do not dip the dummy in something sweet like honey, jam or orange juice. It accelerates tooth decay.
• If your child starts to talk while he is still using the dummy, discourage him from talking with it in his mouth.
• If you decide to use a dummy, use an orthodontic one.
• Sterilize the dummy just like you sterilize other feeding bottles and nipples for your baby and keep it as clean as possible.
• Keep a regular check on the condition of your baby’s dummies. Check for cracks, splits and holes that can trap germs. Replace old dummies immediately.
• Do not hang dummies around your baby’s neck with a string or ribbon. It can be dangerous if the ribbon wraps around the neck.

Weaning from the dummy:

When the right time comes, your child might not be very willing to give up his dummy. Some children get very attached to them. Then you can try using the following tips:

• Try putting a complete stop to it. Usually children fret and cry for only 2-3 days before adjusting to a non-dummy life. Try to accomplish this task at a time when you have a little help and rest, for example on a weekend. Choose the right time to give it up, not when you are under pressure to do so.
• If this does not work try gradually reducing the times you allow your baby to have his dummy, for example at bedtime only.
• Tell your child that giving up a dummy is a good thing to do. Persuade them to give their dummies to someone older they love and respect. Also try to get an older child to agree with you that giving up a dummy is a sensible thing to do. Little children love acting like grown ups.
• Reward your child for giving up his dummy but do not reward him with sweets. You can also use a star chart to motivate him.
• Once you have decided to give up the dummy, don’t be tempted to give it back and make sure there are none left lying around the house.

The fear of spoiling a baby, especially for first time parents, is a constant companion in parenthood. Not knowing what parenthood is like and always anxious to please their child, parents worry that they will spoil their baby’s habits, making him, in turn, a spoilt toddler, a spoilt child and a spoilt teenager. The fear of spoiling one’s own child come from the Spoiling Theory, popularized by childcare ‘experts’ in the early part of the twentieth century. The theory suggests that if you pick up a baby when he cries, he will understand that this is the way to get things done his way. Consequently, he will cry more to be picked up. However, observation and research shows that this is not true in real life.

New parents are also warned against “manipulation” at the hands of their baby. It should be understood that the baby is too young to understand manipulation. He does not purposefully annoy his mother. When he cries in the first few months of his life, he is expressing a need that should be fulfilled. He is not trying to take undue advantage.

What to Do When My Baby Cries:

Keep in mind that very young babies cannot be spoilt. Their crying does not indicate that they need undue attention. As it is their only mode of communication. If a baby cries he is only communicating that need to us. Something that rightly requires attention. Maybe he is hungry, or sleepy, or wet, or in pain. If a baby does not cry, the parents would never get to know that he needs something.

In the early twentieth century, mothers were told not to give ‘undue’ attention to their child, which meant that they were to ignore the baby unless it was his feeding time. They had to endure the torture of seeing their baby cry and scream and not be able to pick him up and soothe him. People also thought that feeding the baby on self-demand would spoil him. However, researches now show that rushing to meet your baby’s needs actually builds a strong bond of love, trust and security. When the mother gives importance to a baby’s cry, it teaches him self-worth. He also understands not to cry without a purpose. Contrary to the belief that babies become very dependent on parents if all their needs are met by them, it is observed that in the long run, babies whose needs are immediately met grow up to be more confident and independent.

Never underestimate the importance of holding and touching your baby when he cries and needs comforting. According to Complete Pregnancy and Baby Book, picking up and holding the baby does not spoil him. Instead, it is a recognized fact that touching a baby helps to build a bond between the mother and child. Mothers who are separated from their babies during the first hour after birth are less confident in their intuitive mothering skills than those who hold theirs and go through the bonding process. As the skin is the baby’s largest and most well-developed sensory organ, the gentle and warm touch of the parents reassures him of their love.

Is it Impossible to Spoil a Baby?

Till 4 or 6 months of age, it is impossible to make a brat out of your child. Till this age babies only express their physical needs (sleep, hunger etc.) and psychological needs (to be held, comforted, reassured etc.) through crying. As the baby’s wants are his needs too till this age, a consistent ‘yes’ response teaches him trust and make him more accepting of a ‘no’ later. However, as the baby grows older, he will learn to express other desires and ask for things that might be harmful for him. This is where you, as a parent, should decide for him. If you do not stop him from things that are harmful for him at this age, there is definitely a chance of spoiling hm. When the baby starts to realize his power, he might exert it.

People often worry about having out-of-control toddlers. This can certainly happen if you keep giving in to each and every demand of the child. It is important to distinguish between the baby’s needs and demands and parents often struggle to do so. A good point to remember to distinguish between these is suggested by Dr. Greene. According to him, whenever your baby asks for something “ask yourself if you are giving your baby what they want or if you are giving in to what they want.” (Click for source)

Holding your baby, responding to his cries, nursing him on cue, and even sleeping with him won’t spoil him. Every baby might have some unique requirement of his own, e.g. some babies want to be cuddled all the time. Even fulfilling these would not mean you are spoiling him. Responding appropriately to your baby won’t spoil him; spoiling suggests responding inappropriately. It is up to you to decide where you want to draw the line.

Attachment Parenting and Indulgent Parenting:

Parents often worry about which style of parenting to adopt to avoid spoiling their children. Some people are of the opinion that ‘attachment parenting’ spoils children but it is important to remember that attachment parenting is not the same as overindulging kids or creating inappropriate dependency. Attachment is a parenting philosophy based on the principles of the attachment theory in developmental psychology. According to attachment theory, a strong emotional bond with parents during childhood, is a precursor of secure, empathic relationships in adulthood. (Click for source) The possessive or over-indulgent parent is constantly in a flurry around her child, doing everything for him because of her own fears and insecurity. Her child may become overly dependent, because he has been kept from doing what he needs to do. An attached mother recognizes when it is appropriate to let her child struggle a bit, experience some frustration, so that he can grow. This is why it is important to balance your chosen parenting style. Attachment differs from dependency. Attachment enhances development; prolonged dependency hinders development. (Click for source)

Some Possible Causes of Parents’ Overindulgence:

Spoiling usually happens, or parents come near it, with the first child. Not only is it a new experience for them and they feel anxiously responsible for that little helpless human and try to do something to comfort him every time he cries, they also project their own hopes and fears on their first born. After their first experience, when the baby cries the parents are more assured and confident, they have a sense of proportion. They do not feel guilty about denying their child something that they are absolutely sure is for his good.

But still, some parents give in to their children’s demands more easily than other. According to Dr. Spock in Baby and Child Care, its possible cause could be:

• They have waited for a long time for a baby or suspect that they cannot have another.
• They have too little self-confidence and become slaves to whatever the child wants. They start expecting him to be whatever they could not be in life.
• They have adopted a baby and feel that they have to do a superhuman job to prove themselves worthy.
• Parents who have studied child psychology/medicine/nursing and feel they need to prove their capability in that field.
• They feel ashamed if they are upset with the baby and try to make things even by giving in to whatever he is asking for.

Always remember, giving love to your baby, hugging, touching, comforting, spending time with him cannot spoil him. It actually is the best part of parenthood. Babies soon grow out of your arms and want to explore everything on their own. So enjoy it while it lasts. Loving your child does not spoil him; in fact, you can never love him enough. Children with happy and secure childhoods are more likely to become confident and independent adults. But the hard part of parenting is to know when to say ‘no’ and be firm about it. It is for your child’s benefit and in the long run, you will see that your child will be grateful to you.

Colic is a very broad and commonly used term by different people in different ways. It is a condition mainly described by symptoms rather than a physiological explanation of what it is. In the 1950s, Dr. Morris Wessel, a well-known New Haven pediatrician, defined an infant with colic as “one who, otherwise healthy and well-fed, had paroxysms of irritability, fussing or crying lasting for a total of three hours a day and occurring on more than three days in any one week for a period of three weeks.” (click for source) Colic crying is often scheduled and happens around late afternoon or early evening. It starts when the baby is about two to four weeks old and usually ends in about three months of age (in some unusual cases it might extend beyond up till six months.) For your baby to be colic it is important that he is otherwise well-fed and healthy. If he has any other medical condition, he might be crying because of that. Before pursuing any treatment for colic, it is important to make sure that your baby is in fact colic.

Symptoms of Colicky Babies:

As colic is a condition primarily described only by its symptoms, it is helpful to keep an eye out for them. Each baby has different symptoms of colic, some exhibit only one while others may show a number of them.

• Colic is not a serious condition. Colicky babies continue to gain weight normally and have no permanent marks on their development because of it. However, it can be difficult on the parents’ nerves to handle a colic baby’s constant crying. A colic baby seems to be in pain which he might exhibit by becoming red in the face, clenching his fists, drawing his legs up to his stomach and then fully stretching them.
• Some colic babies refuse to eat or become very fussy soon after the feed.
• A colicky baby may also lift his head and legs and pass gas.
• Colicky babies might also experience fussiness, irritability, difficulty in sleeping and staying asleep.
• Colicky babies show signs of gas discomfort and abdominal bloating. Their stomachs often become hard and distended.

Colicky crying, but why?

As mentioned, the major characteristic for colic is uncontrollable, extended crying, but due to what? As there is disagreement about what colic really is, there is a lot of difference in opinions about its causes.

• Gastrointestinal discomfort: Most commonly, colic is associated with gastrointestinal discomfort as ‘colic’ comes from ‘colon.’ In the first three months of his life, the baby’s digestive system is still immature and developing till the age of three months. It has not yet developed the bacteria that aids digestion and is only learning to function. Therefore, it experiences spasms that cause colic.
• Immature nervous system: Another suggested cause for colic is a weak nervous system and a tendency of the baby towards general irritability. The baby, with an immature and developing nervous system, gets tensed up due to any external stimulation. Some babies are more sensitive in nature than others (just like adults) and react more to their surroundings. These babies are more prone to crying and becoming irritated due to some sudden change in the environment.  Sometimes it is also believed the colic can arise due to transmission of anxiety and stress from the parents to the baby.
• The baby’s milk: Sometimes colic is also linked to the baby’s milk, whichever he may be taking, breast or bottle. For breast milk, in a few cases, the diet the mother is taking, if it contains volatile chemicals, allergens or other gas producing foods, it may be passed to the infant. For bottle fed babies intolerance for cow milk is sometimes supposed to be the reason for colic.
• Swallowing Air: Babies also swallow air when they are feeding or strenuously crying. This builds up an air bubble that adds to the bloating and discomfort. It is a vicious cycle, the more the baby cries of colic, the more air he swallows and increases his discomfort.
• Crying triggering more crying: It is also thought possible that the baby’s own crying triggers colic crying in the same way a baby is startled by his own startle reflex.
• Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD): In some cases it is also suggested that colic is being caused because of undiagnosed GERD. This makes the baby vomit or become fussy after feeding.

All these causes of colic given above are conjectures and debated upon. Several researches have been conducted upon the causes of colic, producing supporting and contradictory results for each of the above causes. These reasons might or might not be the reason your baby has long spells of crying. As the causes of colic are not definitely agreed upon, there is no guaranteed treatment. Treating the colic is basically making the baby and the mother as comfortable as possible.

Treatment of Colic:

Before consulting your doctor for treatment of colic or concluding that your baby is in fact colicky and trying some home remedies, check for the following. These may be things other than colic that might be making your baby cry:

• Is your baby hungry?
• Is he tired and sleepy?
• Is he wet? Is it time to change his diaper?
• Is there a lack of contact between the mother and baby? Some babies want to be cuddled all the time
• Does the baby startle due to jerky movements or sudden noise?
• Is his body temperature normal? He may be too hot or too cold.
• Is he in pain because of something else? For example an open nappy pin or rash?
• Check with your baby’s doctor for other illnesses like fever, vomiting, cough etc.

If you are sure that your baby is not crying for any of the above reasons, then perhaps he is colic. There is no set treatment of colic; different babies are comforted in different ways. Perhaps one of the following might work for you:

• Avoid overfeeding: Do not over feed your baby in order to make him stop crying. If he is bottle-fed do not urge him to finish his formula. Over feeding may cause gas and stomach aches.
• Reduce amount of air: If your baby is bottle-fed, check the size of the nipple. If it is too big or too small, the baby might be taking in more air than he needs. Also try using a curved bottle or a bottle with collapsible disposable liners. The aim is to reduce the amount of air being swallowed by the baby.
• Switching Formulas: In bottle-fed babies allergies to cow’s milk or soy formulas have also been thought to cause colic. Consult your doctor and if he recommends, try switching to a different formula.
• Changes in a mother’s diet: For breast fed babies there might be something in the mother’s diet causing the colic. Check with your baby’s doctor and with his consultation drop onions, cabbage, cauliflower, spicy foods, caffeine, beans or other gas producing foods from your diet. Eliminating dairy from your diet might also be helpful although you should always check with the doctor. He might not recommend it or give you some calcium supplements.
• Regular Burping: Make sure to burp your baby after every feed to avoid the build up of an air bubble.
• A peaceful environment: When the baby is having a crying episode, take him to a place that is less noisy. Bright lights, a lot of activity, a large number of people around, fatigue and over stimulation, may make the colic episode worse.
• Warm bath/water bottle: Give your baby a warm bath or place a warm water bottle on your baby’s abdominal area. Make sure the water is not too hot by checking it on your hand first and then, for further caution, wrap it in a towel before placing it on the baby. You can also try gently massaging the baby’s stomach and back.
• Try different positions: Some positions are more comfortable for colic babies. For example he might like lying on his stomach in the mother’s lap, or being held with his abdomen resting on the mother’s forearm. As with constipated babies’ cyclic motion, laying a colicky baby on his back and bringing his legs towards his body and pressing his thighs against his abdomen might prove helpful.
• Rhythmic sounds and movements: Colic babies like rhythmic movements and a feeling of closeness. Try rocking or walking your baby or talking him on a car ride.  Rhythmic sounds like those of a dish washer, vacuum cleaner, clothes drier etc. also calm babies down. Some babies also respond well to rhythmic musical tapes.
• Sucking: Allow the baby to suck at the breast, his finger, or a dummy. Sucking in one way or the other sometimes helps babies to calm themselves down.

It is important for parents to allow themselves a break once in a while, as colicky babies can be very taxing on their nerves. Get help and go out for a walk or a movie. Do not feel bad about ‘abandoning’ your baby; you need your time too. It is also important for mothers not to feel guilty about a crying baby. Mothers often tend to feel that way when they can do nothing to pacify their child. Also remember not to feel responsible for the colic, you are not causing it and it is not your fault. Do not let this interfere with the development of a close relationship with the baby. Colic is very common in infants up to 3 months of age, so do not worry, relax and enjoy parenthood

Works and Internet Resources Cited:

• The Complete Pregnancy and Baby Book by Vicki Lansky et al.
• Baby and Child Care by Dr. Benjamin Spock
• The New Parents Guide: http://www.thenewparentsguide.com/babys-and-colic.htm
• T. A. Lawrance at Colic Calm: http://www.coliccalm.com/baby_infant_newborn_articles/baby_colic_treatment.htm
• Medicine Net: http://www.medicinenet.com/colic/article.htm