Crying is never pleasant, but some babies have particularly loud and shrill cries. They cry throughout the day and throughout the night, and nobody can tell why. Many new parents face each day exhausted from the last, wondering how a baby that can bring parents so much joy can also bring them to a mental breaking point.
Conditions in pregnancy such as mild malnutrition or toxemia can give a baby a cry of 700 to 800 cycles per second, as opposed to the normal 300 to 400. Cries of some babies are measured as high as 80 decibels. Premature babies or babies that are small for their age may have cries that are louder, more shrill, or more arrhythmic than other babies and these cries are much more unpleasant to our ears.
Excessive crying, frequently referred to as colic, occurs in 20 to 25 percent of infants. Most pediatricians define excessive crying using the rule of 3:
- The infant cries for more than three hours a day
- The infant has a period of excessive crying at least 3 days a week
- This pattern continues for at least 3 consecutive weeks
Characteristics defining excessive crying
Onset of the cry
Excessive crying typically has a rapid and abrupt onset with little build up. More disturbing to parents, the baby does not seem to have an off-switch to his crying. The crying just continues on and on without any flow. Some parents describe that their babies seem out of control or in constant pain.
Physical signs during intense crying
Besides the crying, there are also distinct physical signs that a baby exhibits during these periods of intense crying. His stomach will tighten and tummy hardens, his fists will clench and he will wave his arms. His legs will be drawn up and his face would become red. Every muscle of his body tightens as he screams. Many infants seem to hold their breath when they are crying.
Inconsolable
The most disturbing aspect of this excessive crying is that the infant is inconsolable and nothing seems to work in getting the baby to calm down. With some babies, even the calming techniques don’t work.
Calming Techniques
There are many ways to calm a baby and even the most difficult infants respond to one or two of the methods given below.
Rhythmic Rocking
Most babies respond well to being rocked in your arms, a pram or a cradle. You will soon notice that the baby has his own preferred tempo. Some infants like to be rocked slowly, others more quickly although you should never rock or shake your baby too vigorously. Some mothers have observed that their babies seem to be stimulated by side to side rocking and calm down by up and down rocking but each baby and parent has to find out what feels right.
Swaddling
Wrapping your baby tightly in blankets is very comforting to some infants presumably this gives them the sense of being back in the cozy warmth of the womb.
Warm Bath
A warm bath helps some babies but not others. Some infants become very agitated when put in a bath and you will find this out quickly. Remember to gradually introduce to the warm bath. First wetting him with water from your hand, then gradually putting in his feet and legs and then his torso. Your calm and steady voice and hand will help your baby learn that this is a comforting experience.
Smells
Certain smells are said to be comforting to a baby particularly the smell of lavender and chamomile. A baby’s sense of smell is fully developed at birth and babies react to strong smells in a similar fashion as adults. In the last few years several cosmetic companies have made smelly scented oils for baby’s bath which is supposed to be soothing.
The most comforting smell to a baby is the smell of his parents. If you have an infant under 3 months take care to use the same shampoo, perfume or cologne everyday. These smells combined with your natural body smell are what your baby finds pleasing.
Take a Ride
Some babies only calm down when they are taken for a push chair or car ride.
Sing a Song
Although you may not be in the mood to sing a song when you are holding a screaming baby in your arms try it anyway. There is a reason that virtually every culture sings soft melodic songs to their babies. Find a song that your baby seems to respond to and sing it over and over again because babies love repetition.
Rhythmic Sounds
Some babies are also calmed by machine noises. If you do not feel like running these machines all the time consider buying a CD of favorite baby sounds or recording them yourself.
Massage
Massaging your baby is a wonderful way to communicate with your baby and is also a great way to calm her down. However, like other techniques it does not seem to help all babies. Some infants are overly sensitive to touch and actually start crying when you massage them.
Above all keep trying, research tells us that parents of babies that cry a lot often overestimate the time the baby cries and underestimate their own ability to calm their baby down. Observing your baby’s cries will help you see what works and what does not.